Pinocchio How Your Nose Grows!

Here it is. The first REAL bit of scandal since Johnathan Roos with Manuelgate. What follows will soon so be known as Showergate. As you well know when you sign up to these reality shows you sign away all your privicy rights. Afterall their are cameras inside ALL the rooms in the House including the bathroom. Now most of the contestants up until now have not covered up of shyed away whilst in the bathroom, possinly because they di'n tread their contract throughly enough and don't know the cameras are there. Still one housemate, Boo Boo had insisted on bathing in the swimming costume up until now. The swimming costume in concern happened to have been thrown out by Ella a week ago after saying "it does nothing for you darling, completely beastly". boo Boo has since then forfeitted her shower everyday for the past week. Since she is starting to make a damn awful smell that even the cat is adverse to, she has been forced to shower in the nude. Now fraud is a crime under the Fraud act 2006. Fraud by flase representation is S2 of said act. Now we're not being picky, but it clearly states on Boo Boos registration form that she is female. Starting to get the picture? If not then just look above as Boo Boo let's her ummm....bearhood hang out for all to see.Well the hidden cameras that is. Not wonder she ummmm he keeps flashing those tits of hers umm I mean his I think he had everone fooled, even his um her ex husband Coco, which just throws open a whole heap of other questions! Due to this we have reluctantly had to withdraw Boo oo from the House. There are still 3 Housemates left and the blog competition comes to a close today! Awwww I hear you7 cry. Well I will carry on so long so do not fear! However, with another eviction this week the two remaining houselates will battle it out to be crowned the winner of Bear Brother 2009 on friday. Be sure not to miss the last leg of the series, after which Bear4 will be having a short break before a new show starts( Hint it gives out blow up 'Busters' on each show)

The Ugly Duckling Becomes A Swan

Ok so not exactly. Yes her clothes are still dreaful and her hair a complete disaster, but good ol' Betty can finally take to the stage after been eclipsed ( and possibly more) by the evil Ella. So what has Betty got to offer the Bear brother house I hear you all cry, shes done nothing up until now, so how do we know if we like the cut of her jib? Well as mentioned previously Betty is a wiz in writing magazine articles. So here it is. Ever wondered why betty's clothes don't match? Ever wondered why her hair is so damn messy? BB thought we would share one of Betty's articles with you all enjoy;

The Morning routine by Betty Bear

The alarm clock sounds. It's time to get up. But what happens next is both natue's gift and it's curse. Having hit the snooze button and promising yourrself you will get up in a minute you roll over to find it has been 20. Now I don't kinow about you, but getting up grdually is usially better than all of a sudden. The covers are thrown back in a frantic rush, the cold air nipping at your recently toasty body. AHHHH you burst out of your room and quickly by pass the queue for the bathroom and lock yourself inside. You quickly turn on and jump into the shower. damn that is cold, qucik turn on the hot ah better no no hot hot hot hot cold cold cold cold, sod it quick the shampoo., dammit I have dropped it, ah now theres some in my eyes. you blindly reach up and grab what you think is the shampoo and empty half the bttle on yor head and rub it in. Frick thats the bubble bath, ah no time wash it off, bubbles everywhere. You jump out and and dry your self quickly, but you have forgotttten to bring in the day's clothes with you. Danmit you get dressed in your PJ's again and harried rush and grab whatever is closest in the wardrobe. You fling on whatever it is, be it your old bike pants or that sweater your Aunt knitted you that one Christmas. Quick hairdryer. No time for gentle dryer push it on full and hold it close to your face. Ah the wild look, not really what you were hoping for. Oh well, downstairs eat your breakfast. Urgh the milk was off. nermind move back to the bathroom the clean your teeth. You press the tube too hard and toothpaste squirts everywhere, you try to lick it off but it just keeps coming back.. Never mind grab your bag and out the door with 3 minutes before the bus gets here. Planty of time. wait. Why is everyone looking so fuzzy? frick. Yourush back and get your glasses just in time to see the bus wiz past you yet again. I say wiz more like rumble. Damn. wait theres hope it had broken down again so you run to catch it up. Phew. Made it again. Just.

Fast Forward Time

I am sure a good deal of you look forward to the weekend. I, for one sure do and sure do not like having one whole hour taken out of it. Why could this magic hour not be taken out of the Friday afternoon, when everyone wants it to be one hour faster, one hour closer to the weekend. Why that can't happen No, they would rather take it out in the middle of the night so everyone wakes up wondering what the hell has happened and why they feel so tired. So what do the Housemates think of this mass theft? Well, seeing as they hibernate for most of the winter it is very confusing for them to wake up and suddenly have lost an hour. Environmental people think it is the weather that is to blame for the animales odd behaviour. They are wrong. It is the time change. And then their is the tiresome task of changing all the alarm clocks, watches, timers, etc in the house to say the right time. Well, for the first couple of days I am usually stubborn in thinkiong they DO say the right time and everyone els is a fool to think otherwise. This kind of backfires when it comes to showing up for lessons on time or chatching the college bus home.
Although is it a blessing in discuise? Afterall come the winter we will gain this extra magic hour back and have the perfect excuse to stay in bed for one hour longer, with no feelings of guilt whatsoever. Still no gain without pain, and this I feel really needs one massive neurophen.

We Got The Ella That Did It

Yesterday we could most definitely sympathise with poor ol' Seymour. We didn't see it coming. Well niether did he. After trawling through hours of servailence footage, no one could find Seymour leaving any of the Bear Brother House exits. So we have come to the conclusion. He did not leave at all. Yes we were all stumped until Seymour's dog, Samual, spent the entire day sat outside of Ella's wordrobe. How odd. Ella has taken Samual under her wing as I said yesterday, but clearly the dog would not have taken to her so soon and quickly forget his master? Of course not. He was in fact sitting beside his master who was later found in several shoe boxes ( who would have thought Ella the fashion Queen would have hidden the body in there?!). The apparent cause of death was death by strangulation. The murder weapon? A Gucci thong ( Do Gucci make thongs? If not then Ella must have a one off as a special gift for being the Queen of fashion ;) ) Police, however are still very baffled as to Ella's motive for committing TV's first murder broadcast live. Apparently no one notice because they were too bust writing a letter of complaint to BB as moments before a drunken Co Co siad Boo Boo's name a little too quickly and actually said 'Boob' instead. We have yet to have any complaints regaurding Ella's actions in the bedroom. Ella has now been evicted from the Bear brother House and sent to it's sister show; The Bid Doll House, where she will be for the next 15 years at least. BB suspects Ella's motive was to have Seymour's dog samual and later turn him into a pair of slippers.
And she would have gotten away with it to, if it wasn't for those pesky kids and that dog! Wait I mean Pesky Dog!
Well that was the last of a week of evictions tomorrow will resume House antics. Now where are those Scoo.... I mean Booby snacks....

Now You Seymour....Now You Don't

On this. the forth night of evicitions, Bear Brother sees it's most blogged about Housemate; Seynmour leave the Bear Brother House. Ok so I exaaggerate. Seymour is in fact the least blogged about Housemate, having done little, if anything intersting whilst in the House. Well done to the producers for selecting such an intersting buch of bearss to go into the house. Pfft. The fact is nobody really knows where, or even when Seymour left the house. One moment he was there the next he had simply vanished, leaving only his dog; samual, his dark glasses and his walking stick. Had he suddenly and mysterilly been cured of blindnesss or perhaps he was never blind in the first place, after all he did 'accidently' walk into the girl's changing room several times, but wheres the harm in letting in the blind fellow, he's not going to see anything right? Now that just leaves the question of his best friend and companion, Samual. Having already fouled the kitty tray and the living room floor, Samual seems to be attracting quite a lot of attention, not all of it good if you get what I mean. Ella seems to be sniffing around him qite a lot, and now completely out of character, has taken him under her wing...errrr....paws. Perhaps Seymour's disapperence is not qquite as mysterious as we first thought....
Tomorrows blog will reaveal ALL....

Spice Up Your Life!

On the third of five evictions this week, seees the wanna be Delia, Bernard, leaving the Bear brother House. Having somehow managed to not poison anyone during his time in the House, it was irionic that the only person to fall foul of Bernard's culninary distaters, was Bernard himself. After a visit from House a couple of days ago, Bernard has been using an infamatory; Itch 'O' Gone to clear up certain problems in thw downstairs area. Where could he do this without the embarrassment of having the other Housemates see? Well the kitchen was the logical answer as that is where he spends most of his time ( No obviously false stories about why he was in the bathroom too long) and besides all the Housemates were avoiding the kitchen out of fear Bernard migght ask them to have a taste, or even worse, sample his food. So what could pssibly go wrong? well whilst taking a break from preparing that night's meal, a curry, Bernard took time out to apply his medication. However, as he was starting to put on thhe Itch 'O' Gone the oven destracted him as the timeer went off. he put dwn his powder and turned off the alarm. Without looking he picked it up again and applied a generous amount. SAt first his meat was tender, than it went quite raw. As Bernard wailed in agony he looke at his hand to find he was in fact, holding the Chille Powder. Ouch. He won't be stuffing roat dinners for quite a mile yet.
Only 8 Housemates remain and with two still to be evicted this week who will survie? Plus will Seymour or Betty ever do anything worth blogging about? all that and more tomorrow!

Sneeze Outta Here!

Well here it is. On the second night of eviction week, someone is leaving the BB house....in a body bag. Yes yet again one of our house mate's is for the chop. Poor old Chief has bitten the dust, which means Hank is out too seen as they entered as a pair and only counted as one contestant. So here's the scoop. Do you remember a couple of weeks ago when dear Monty 'left' the BB house? Good. Then you will also remember that BB kindly replaced the well loved snake with a wee little kitty. Well seems that it's followed in the same tracks as Monty's snake and bumped off a housemate. Hank, having stayed up far too late in the pornography room fell asleep surrounded by copies of 'BTB Club' featuring Vixen. In wonders the sweet little Kitty looking for a nice pace to curl up. This just happened to be Hank's head. Well Hank failed to mention on his application form that he is allergic to pussies. No not that you dirty minded person. He is allergic to cats. This obviously sent Hank into severe sneezing fit, with the poor cat clinging on for dear life on top of Hank's head. Somehow, using what could only be described as a psychic twin connection, Chief rushed in aid of his brother, unaware of just how baddly Hanks needed to sneeze. As the cat was being wrenched from his head, Hank let out a massive Sneeze, covering Cheif, head to foot in mucas. Cheif also failed to mention he was severely allergic to mucas and the germs soon eneterd his body and killed him within seconds. Hank has been taken to hospital where he is expeected to make a full recovery, once the plastic sergeon has found and reattached his nose.
Who will go tomorrow? What farfetched death plot will there be next?! Find out tomorrow!